Waitress 101: Nonverbal Do's & Dont's

 

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       Regardless of what anyone tells you, waiting tables is hard. It doesn't always take the brightest person to do the job, but trust me when I say not everyone can be a good waitress. Sure, there are the parts of being a waiter/waitress that everyone can see - writing down orders, running drinks, bringing checks, etc. Don't be fooled, however, because there's a whole part to this job that often goes unnoticed. 

       What is it? Controlling your nonverbal communication! 

       As with many other jobs, dealing with the public is hard. From personal experience, being a waitress really knows how to test your limits. Patience really is a virtue when you're spending hours waiting on people who you don't even know, but to whom you owe your undivided attention. When the going gets tough, it's tempting to throw your hands up in the air or give a little eye-roll to the customer who just asked that oh-so-ridiculous question. 

       But you can't! Kinesics are more convincing of one's true feelings than verbal communication. If you respond to that oh-so-ridiculous question with "of course, no problem", but give a smirk or have an unconvincing tone, the customer may think you're being sarcastic. Even if you don't really mean what you're saying, they will know what you really are thinking unless you control your facial expressions, voice, and gestures. 

 

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       In addition, it's important to make the customer feel welcome. The restaurant environment can get extremely hectic, but the customer doesn't need to feel the effects of what's happening in the kitchen. The cooks messed up your order, the managers are screaming for servers to come run the food that's up in the window, and oops- you just spilled your drink - but no one needs to feel that pressure except for the staff.  So how do you do it? 

You smile. 

You control the pitch in your voice. 

You maintain a relaxed pace of speech. 

You make eye contact with the customers. 

You nod your head yes. (The customer is always right, you know) 

You give off positive emblems - a thumbs up, per say 

You don't bite your finger nails. 

You don't speak too quickly. 

You don't act antsy or impatient. 

You don't look at other tables while speaking to another. 

You don't have the look of concern. 

       So let's say it's not busy. Well, guess what - you still need to be aware of your nonverbals. Researchers have found that people who are engaging in a positive, enjoyable conversation are mimicking each other's actions. We're not talking about Simeon Says actions. We're talking about crossing and uncrossing legs, leaning forward and backward, and other similar gesture sequences. Matching behaviors often cause people to rate a conversation in a more positive light. We all know that better conversation = better tips. Cha-Ching. 

       Engage in the conversation and be happy! Remember that vision accounts for approximately 80% of sensory perception. People are watching you, and your actions matter. There are nearly 700,000 physical signs that can be produced by humans, so make sure you choose the right ones no matter what you're doing.

Albada, Kelly. "Module 6 Part I - Gestures Powerpoint." NCSU COMM 322 Class. Raleigh, NC: North Carolina State University, 2014. Web. 3 Nov. 2014.